How to Live an Authentic Life Without Oversharing

Teenage girl sitting on a park bench with her cell phone sending text messages.

Often, oversharing is an unconscious act — many times people don’t realize it until after the fact that they've just spilled major details about their personal lives. (Image: Antonio Guillem via Dreamstime)

Often, oversharing is an unconscious act — many times people don’t realize it until after the fact that they’ve just spilled major details about their personal lives.

The invasion of digital technologies often blurs the line between personal and public life. For women and men coping with many complex issues and personal challenges, deciding the amount of information to share with others can prove to be a hurdle. Psychologists often come across patients who find it hard to draw a line between authentic vs. oversharing. 

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Have you felt the same at times? Well, read on to find out how you can draw a line between the two and refrain from doing things that amount to oversharing.

Finding the balance between being authentic and oversharing can be hard

No matter how intelligent or educated you are, finding the balance between staying authentic and sharing excess information about yourself can be quite tedious. Sometimes, it can be something as simple as sharing some pictures on your social media profiles. Maybe you have spent a vacation in a nice place and posted the images on your social media profiles. Sometimes, people pen down emotional notes on their social media profiles too. It would be awkward to find people trolling you for things you had never thought would ruffle their feathers! 

When you end up oversharing personal updates, the consequences may be varied and adverse.
When you end up oversharing personal updates, the consequences may be varied and adverse. (Image: Anton Garin via Dreamstime)

Problems that can arise from oversharing

When you end up oversharing personal updates, the consequences may be varied and adverse.

  • It may lead to complications and conflicts in your workplace
  • It may give your enemies more chances to exploit your weaknesses
  • It will make you feel bad that you crossed your safe limits and put trust in the wrong people
  • You may get drawn into unnecessary and unwanted disputes with people you hardly know
  • It may affect your personal relations too, in the long run

How to refrain from oversharing information and updates

There is no precise formula to find out information sharing feasibility as such. However, you have to use your common sense and analyze relevant factors before sharing information with anyone. This includes information and updates shared on social media and also on a personal level, over the phone or face to face.

Think of the topic sensitivity

Sometimes, sharing your opinion and experience on a topic that is generally deemed controversial can attract adverse reactions from others. This happens when you share your opinion on social media platforms on topics related to religion, political developments or castes, etc.

Be very careful when you share your candid views on such sensitive matters on any public forum. Even if you share such views with a person, think of his or her mindset and attitude towards the topic.

Facebook and Twitter app icons on a smartphone
Be very careful when you share your candid views on such sensitive matters on any public forum. (Image: via Pixabay)

Think of the recipient’s mindset

It is also necessary to think of the mindset and perception level of the recipients you are sharing your views and updates with. Not everyone in the family or friend circle will share a similar view on various subjects, naturally.

Sometimes, expressing your candid views on certain topics with friends can also lead to conflicts and heated arguments. So if you feel a person does not think on the same lines as you on some topics, it is best to avoid bringing it up. It is also necessary to think of the reliability and maturity level of the recipients, more so when you share personal updates.

Using a neutral tone or approach

When you want to share your views on sensitive topics, it is prudent to use a neutral tone or approach. This does not mean you have to hide what you feel but the tone of expression has to be tweaked to an extent. 

Analyzing the relation and equation with the recipients

It is important to think of the equation you share with the person with whom you want to share something. If you want to share something personal, it should not be with someone you have met recently. In case you like the person and consider him/her trustworthy, share in brief. Some people will not be interested to learn about your personal developments and updates and not sharing personal things with them will be prudent. 

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