3 Funny Short Stories You Can Tell Your Friends

Three women laughing around a table.

Nothing captures the irony of any moment better than a short story. (Image: Igor Mojzes via Dreamstime)

Sometimes, we happen to experience really awkward moments with friends. It’s often hard to put the awkwardness into words. Often, sharing funny short stories will help you do just that.

3 funny short stories

1. Greed never pays off

Angus is a cheap man; even the wedding gift for his cousin was bought from a discount store.

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One day, Angus received an unfamiliar phone call: “Hello, this is Latifa Hospital in Dubai. We have a meta-patient who needs pre-op blood, but his blood type is rare. We have searched for a long time and finally found your blood type in your country’s blood bank. Would you be willing to donate blood?”

Angus asked: “What’s in it for me?”

The person said: “Don’t worry, the patient is an Arab sheik, so the benefits will be great.”

After hearing this, Angus finally agreed to donate his blood.

Expensive jewellery and Funny short stories tell us about life as it is not how we want it to be.
(Expensive jewelry. Sometimes good deeds are preciously rewarded. (Image: Dimjul via Dreamstime)

The sheik’s surgery went very well and he did not lose any blood, so Angus’ blood was not used. But after he recovered, the sheik sent someone to Angus’s house to give him a brand new BMW, 5 carats of diamonds, and a million pounds. Angus was overjoyed.

One day, a few years later, Angus received another call from the hospital. It turned out that the sheik had developed a complication and had to undergo corrective surgery. As a precaution, Angus was asked to donate blood. Thinking of the generous gift he received last time, Angus quickly agreed to do so. This time, Angus’s blood came in handy because of the blood loss during the surgery.

One day, soon after, Angus received a special delivery from the sheik. What could it be this time? Angus’s mind imagined different possibilities: Diamonds? Jewelry? Gold? Cheques? He couldn’t wait to open the package and found only a thank you card and a jar of marzipan. Angus was both surprised and shocked: What kind of gift is this? It was a far cry from the last one!

He called the sheik and said excitedly: “I gave you a little bit of blood this time, I thought you would be as generous as last time, but all you gave me was a card and a jar of candy!”

The sheik replied: “Who said it was your blood that was flowing in my veins?”

2. The Pig’s Revolt

A pig, a sheep, and a cow were kept in the same stall by a shepherd. One day, the shepherd took the pig out of the stall, only to hear the pig scream loudly.

The sheep and the cow hated his howling and complained: “We are often caught by the shepherd, but we do not shout like you.”

A happy pig in the countryside.
A happy pig in the countryside. (Image: Ulrich Mueller via Dreamstime)

The pig responded: “Catching you and catching me are two entirely different things.”

He caught you, only to share your hair and milk, but catching me, means to take my life !

3. ‘Tell them it’s free!’

A plane emergency landed on the ocean. The stewardess wanted the passengers to slide down and take the lifeboat. But the passengers dared not slide down. So the stewardess asked the captain for help.

Ocean waters and the horizon above.
Ocean waters and the horizon above. Emergency landings onto the ocean are not easy. (Image: La Fabrika Pixel S.l. via Dreamstime)

The knowledgeable captain said: “You have to tell the Americans that it’s an adventure, the British that it’s an honor, and the French that it’s romantic, the Germans that it’s a rule, and the Japanese that it’s an order, and all problems will be solved.”

The stewardesses softly mumbled: “But sir, they are all Chinese, on a special discount  trip!” The captain smiled: “That’s great, just tell them it’s free!”

Translation by Eva and rewriting by Hermann

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