7 High Tea Etiquette Rules to Know

High tea.
London is a city full of history and tradition, and what better way to experience its charm than by indulging in the ultimate British pastime — afternoon tea? (Image: Michele Jackson via Dreamstime)

High tea was one of the ways for aristocrats and royal families in the British tradition to relax while seated on luxurious high chairs and tables. Hence the name “high tea.” Conventionally, high tea was served between 5 and 7 p.m. It included serving hot tea with pickled fish, cold meats, potato salads, bread, tea cakes, and tarts.

In the 18th century, high tea was revolutionized in England. It became a popular meal for workers after a long day of work. 

On the other hand, afternoon tea, also known as low tea, is served mid-afternoon at about 3 p.m. Afternoon tea was served on low tables, including light snacks, such as scones, sandwiches, curds, and butter. 

Compared to high tea, afternoon tea is a lighter menu. Therefore, the two refer to different things and cannot be used interchangeably. However, nowadays, many people refer to afternoon tea as high tea. 

Regardless of how you refer to it, below is a code of conduct for approaching your afternoon tea party when invited to one.

Afternoon tea requires some level of etiquette and sophistication.
Afternoon tea requires some level of etiquette and sophistication. (Image: SÅ‚awomir Fajer via Dreamstime)

High tea etiquette rules

1. Don’t put your phone and accessories on the table

Phones have become part and parcel of today’s generation. However, putting your phone on the table during afternoon tea is considered rude. During that moment, you are supposed to be occupied with people around you and your conversations. So take a break from social media and enjoy the moment at hand. Besides, tea or other liquids might spill over and ruin your phone. 

2. No hands around the cup

Afternoon tea requires some level of etiquette and sophistication. Do not wrap your hands around the cup, no matter how cold the weather is. Instead, hold the cup by the handle and put your pinky down. 

3. Don’t stir loudly

As mentioned, afternoon tea is a game of elegance. Therefore, be cautious not to make noise while stirring your tea in circular motions. Instead, stir your tea up and down. 

Don’t tap your teaspoon against your cup after stirring; do not lick your spoon. Take a small sip to taste the sugar; do not slurp your tea.

4. Eat the accompaniments in the proper order

Afternoon tea is served with three or more tiers of accompaniments. The tiers will contain sandwiches at the bottom, scones in the middle, and sweets and desserts at the top. Start from the bottom to the top. Just like in any meal, desserts should be eaten last. 

You will not be provided with utensils and cutlery during afternoon tea; the accompaniments should be eaten with your hands. 

Afternoon tea is served with three or more tiers of accompaniments.
Afternoon tea is served with three or more tiers of accompaniments. (Image: Angela Gibson via Dreamstime)

5. You only dunk your scones in tea in your house

Dunking your scones in tea during afternoon tea is highly discouraged. Tempting as it might be, please don’t. Instead, eat each accompaniment separately and savor the different tastes and textures without gobbling down everything simultaneously. 

6. Let the tea cool

Like the civilized person you are, control the urge to blow on your tea to cool it down. If your tea is too hot for your liking, give it a few seconds to cool down a bit before sipping it. You don’t want to burn your tongue or embarrass yourself by spitting out hot tea.

Also, do not gurgle or use your tea to rinse your mouth. If you have some food stuck to your teeth, take a bathroom break and rinse your mouth, then come back and continue to enjoy your tea. 

7. There are no tea bags

Afternoon tea will come already brewed to perfection. You will be given a small tea strainer to hold the loose tea leaves used to brew the tea. Strain your tea, add sugar and milk to your liking, and enjoy. 

Remember, milk or cream is only added to black tea; do not add milk or cream to green tea, matcha, oolong, or other herbal teas. 

Savor the moment

Enjoy your high tea and the experience that comes with it. Don’t be too focused on etiquette and perfection to the point that you feel suffocated. High and afternoon teas are meant to be enjoyable for tea lovers as you catch up with family and friends, so just be yourself and have fun. 

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